Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Good news!

I got accepted into nursing school! School starts August 10th. : )


“We can be confident that His desire to reveal will always be greater than our desire to know.” – Carrie Anna Pearce

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Can I have your attention please!

Wow!
The month of June has literally been a roller coaster ride for myself. The emotions I have experienced have been anywhere from excited and joyful to down right frustrated and depressed. Through all of this perseverance I feel like I am becoming a more genuine follow of my Jesus. I feel like I am to the point where I am yearning Him, because I have nothing else to yearn. Nothing else is going to make me feel the way He does.

A few nights ago I felt as if I had hit rock bottom. I have not been living the life I was created for. I've truthfully been living a life for me, and not for God. I sat down and started writing in my good ol' notebook. I created a list of the reasons why I thought I was depressed.

1. Worried about the future (School, a job, Taylor)
2. No accountability
3. Neglecting church and the Word
4. Personal dislikes about myself

As I was going through the Bible searching for answers, I came across my you version account on line. For that moment I put off my list and started looking through the website. I'm easily distracted might I add! I decided to look through the new reading plans that had been added since I had last been on. I discovered one I thought I would enjoy and checked out that days plan.

The very first thing I read was this.

I am worn out from sobbing. All night I flood my bed with weeping, drenching it with my tears. Psalm 6:6

This particular verse is about David pouring out his all and being completely honest with God. Even though God has our life planned out right in front of Him, He still wants to hear from us. He wants to hear our pain and agony. He wants to know what is upsetting us to the point where we feel like we can not go on. He wants us to turn to Him and say "okay God, I can't do this on my own like I thought I could." The sentence at the end of this content really caught my eye.

"Be honest with God, and he will help you turn your attention from yourself to him and his mercy."

I will be completely honest, here lately my attention has been directed at me and only me. What will be best for me, what happens if I don't get into school, will I be able to find a job if I don't get in to school? All these thoughts have been racing through my mind. But you know what, it's not about me. It's about the One who can and will take all this pain away.

So God, here is my attention directed rightfully at You, and only You.

<3

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Step by step.

Life is just flat out hard sometimes. :(

but...

I stand firm in my belief that God is glorified during those times we think we can not take that next step. We may give up on everything else, but we must continue to walk in faith. We have to believe He is right there with us. He is cheering us on, knowing we are completely capable of anything.

That next step you are going to take might be unknown by you, but it is known by our Creator. :) So don't worry about what is going to happen next. He already knows, and He is going to take care of everything for you! With each step you take, bring glory to our God & make him proud!






The Bahamas-2011

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Sweet summertime

What have I gotten myself into?

Well it is official. I have made the transition. I am once again a resident of the town I grew up in.

& it's no bueno. I am not handling the change very well. I've been down in the dumps, shed a few tears and I have not been getting much sleep.

I've been lonely. It's really hard for me to make friends, so a certain prayer lately has been for friendships to prosper.

I have to constantly keep reminding myself that this isn't about me though. May all the glory go to God. <3

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

3 more days!

When I look back and think about how often I tried to find another job, I am so thankful it never happened. God's plan for me was/is so much more magnificent then what I was trying to plan for myself. Now I feel silly when I think about all the times I was so determined on leaving this job and starting a new one.

I am so thankful for his plan overriding mine : )

Jeremiah 29:11 is the perfect verse for this situation, "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Now my time has finally come! I have 3 more days left at Quiznos. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that this is exactly what God has planned for me. His plans for me for the near future are still unknown. This probably sounds scary to some, but for me it is pure excitement. I know from previous experiences, for me to plan my future it would be a complete waste of time. It is already planned for me, I just have to wait for God to reveal it to me when he knows I am ready.

For now, I will rest in the comfort of his love.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Christ Ambassador

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow.




Monday, May 2, 2011

The countdown begins!

May 13th: Last day of work!
May 15th: Fly out to Florida.
May 16th: Leave on a boat for the next 4 days for some much needed R&R.
May 20th: Arrive back into Oklahoma into the arms of my love <3
May 21st: Watch my little cousin get married :)
May 31st: Be completely moved to Hennessey.

& that's all I know.

I am giving up my life of comfort. This opportunity is allowing me to completely rely on my God to provide and lead me. & I wouldn't have it any other way.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Change is in the air :)

It's truly magnificent to look back on my past and really see the hands of God at work. He has been slowly molding me into this perfect creation of His.

Change:[cheynj]
verb (used with object)
1.
to make the
form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone: to change one's name; to change one's opinion; to change the course of history.

Friday May 13th will be the last day I will ever make a Quiznos sandwich. It's a bitter sweet feeling knowing on May 14th I will no longer have the kind of responsibility I have had for the past 3 years. The next 2 weeks will be followed by a much needed vacation, packing up all my belongings and stuffing them into a storage unit and soaking in the changes in store for myself.

I'm one of those people who has had a certain prayer for quite some time now. It's been one of those prayers that always ended with Go
d telling me "No." I am slowly beginning to see why my prayer always got turned down. It's only because what I wanted for myself, would never compare with what God has in store for me.

God has made me extremely content with what is in store for the future. Maybe because the only thing he knows I have left to do is to completely put all of my trust in Him. And that is exactly what I am doing. :)

I will be moving back to good ol' Hennessey to help on the farm this summer. The past 7 months have been very rocky for my family, so I feel that this is where I need to be for the time being. I already know there will be struggles for the 2 months I will be back home, but in James 1:2-4 tells me to accept these struggles with joy. I will persevere thro
ugh each struggle with a joyful heart.

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. James 1:12